Tuesday 24 April 2007

They walk among us

I was at the checkout of a Kmart.  The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I  gave it back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor and gave her the money back. She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing and returned the money again. I gave her the money back again... same senario!  I departed the store with the $46.64.   

I walked into a Mickey D 's with a buy-one-get- one-free coupon For a sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little Chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one- get-one-free" , she said, "so I guess they're both free" She handed me my free sandwiches and I walked out the door.    

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one Of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the Sky and said, "Where?"    

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh I don't keep up with that stuff."

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a Seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a Trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?"

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

14 comments:

  1. how funny life is hun,i hope youre well,im writing on my hubbys blog for now so pop over anytime,youre most welcome love zoe,formally domestic abuse now...
    http://journals.aol.co.uk/zoepaul6968/ramblings-of-a-married-man

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  2. I enjoyed these lol some rum folk about ! ...love Jan xx

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  3. lol, thanks for the laughs Guido

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  4. ROFLOL!!!! And you know....the scary thing is...when I am out and about, I run into people like that all the time! eek!!! lol
    Lisa

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  5. Guido
    Thanks for the chuckles to start my day.  I enjoyed!
    Sam

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  6. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Sug

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  7. Lot`s of DUH!!! stories really funny!
    bella xx

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  8. Thanks for the laughs !! I have copied it and sent it on to my dear niece who is in much need of a laugh   Sybil xx

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  9. Oh my!  Scary, isn't it?
    Lori

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  10. Thanks for the smile Guido!! Amazing isn't it the lack of common sense on some peoples part. (Hugs) Indigo

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  11. HA HA HA Scary if these are true!
    Pam

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  12. Very Funny and I bet some of them are true

    Yasmin

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  13. Did you go to the USA Guido??
    You have not told us about your trip then, have you?
    Valerie
    http://journals.aol.co.uk/iiimagicxx/surreality/

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  14. These are some winners! Lol...
    Linda :)

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