These
notices were in church bulletins or were announced in church
services:
Ø Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at St. Martin's Church.
Please use the large double doors at the side entrance.
Ø The Fasting
& Prayer Conference includes meals.
Ø The sermon this morning: "Jesus
Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight "Searching for Jesus."
Ø Our
youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation
hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
Ø Ladies, don't forget
the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping
around the house. Don't forget your husbands.
Ø The peacemaking
meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
Ø
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone
who is hard to love Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much
about you.
Ø Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church
help.
Ø Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again,"
giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
Ø For those of you who
have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
Ø Next
Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can
get.
Ø Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for
more
transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes
of Father Jack's sermons.
Ø The Priest will preach his farewell
message after which the choir will sing "Break Forth Into
Joy."
Ø Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24
in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school
days.
Ø A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church
hall. Music will follow.
Ø At the evening service tonight, the sermon
topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir
practice.
Ø Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the
addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older
ones.
Ø Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
Ø Please place
your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want
remembered.
Ø The church will host an evening of fine dining, super
entertainment and gracious hostility.
Ø Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00
PM - prayer and medication to follow.
Ø The ladies of the Church have
cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on
Friday afternoon.
Ø This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in
the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to
sin.
Ø Ladies Bible Study will be held Thurs. morning at 10 AM All
ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is
done.
Ø The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation
would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next
Sunday.
Ø Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM.
Please use the back door.
Ø The eighth-graders will be presenting
Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at 7 PM. The
congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
Ø The Priest unveiled
the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up
Yours"
Sunday, 17 December 2006
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I loved all these Guido, church notice boards can be so funny, I've seen a few, must try to remember them next time! Jeannette xx http://beta.journals.aol.co.uk/jlocorriere05/Welcometomytravels/
ReplyDeleteThese are excellent are they real ,or did YOU make them up lol ...love Jan xx
ReplyDeleteGuido, these made me LAUGH!! Are they real or did you make them up??
ReplyDeletePam
Are they for real?? They are funny, take care...
ReplyDeleteJoyce
It's funny what a little mistake made in haste can do to a notice. Very funny !! Linda in (now frosty at 20 degrees) Washington state.
ReplyDeleteLove these...are they actual postings? Funny how words slip off the tongue in the wrong way. Chris
ReplyDeleteThese were so funny! Thanks so much Guido for the laugh.
ReplyDeleteHuggers,
Gayla
No wonder he encourages us to let our words be few and speak carefully!! - Barbara
ReplyDelete